4:00 a.m. and I'm sitting on my couch again staring at a dark wall. The last trimester of my pregnancy has brought with it a case of insomnia. Generally, I'm a good sleeper. I'd even go so far as to call it a skill. I've often said that if relay sleeping ever became an Olympic sport, my sister and I would pair up to take the gold. But now it's 4:00 a.m. and I'm staring at a wall, with my hand on my stomach, listening to the baby move around inside my belly.
The baby didn't wake me up though, nor am I uncomfortable, not beyond reason anyway. Just awake. A couple of times a week, I open my eyes around 3 a.m. and can't shut them again. I linger in bed, take a bathroom break, tour the kitchen for water or a snack, stare at the wall. Sometime around 5 or 6, when it starts to get a little light outside, I finally drift back to sleep.
Insomnia feels like a not-quite itch between your toes that you can't scratch.
I suppose this is nature's way of preparing me for midnight feedings and whatnot. It wouldn't bother me much, if there was actually someone to feed (besides myself), and if I didn't have to get up in the morning and go to work.
The cats follow me around the house in the dark. Meeko, my constant satellite, perches next to me on the back of the couch and stares at the same wall I do. I pick up my book and put it down a few minutes later. My head is spinning, making lists of all the things I need to do.
My due date is October 13th, which means I could deliver in as little as two weeks, or maybe not until last few days of October. It's a five week spread, which makes it a little hard to plan for. There are lots of little things left to do. Things like figuring out how to get the car seat latched into the car, assembling the baby's dresser that's in a million pieces, packing a bag for the hospital, etcetera, etcetera. Nothing that I need to take on at 4 in the morning, but things that my head keeps returning to nonetheless.
Every now and then, I glance at the clock.
4:01. Hrmmm.
A long night.