Not Without My Effects

June 18, 2011 - 7:43pm -- swingbug

“Okay, I have the pieces of eight. If you have the keys to the pirate ship, I think we’re ready to go”

“Don’t forget your sword.”


“Mommy, where’s my pop gun?”

“Daddy has it.”

“Okay, sword? Check. Dagger? Check. Pirate hat? Check. Pistol? Check.

“We’re ready. All aboard.”

“Wait! Wait, hold the boat; I forgot something!”


“I need my knitting.”

Pixies and Pirates

June 22, 2010 - 9:34pm -- swingbug

“Jenny, get you ass out here.”

I’m standing in front of my neighbor’s house holding a black garment bag. I’m wearing a flaming red knee length chiffon dress with a black leather corset and there is a tree branch decked out in red and silver berries that appears to be eating my head.

“Why? I look more ridiculous than you do,” Jenny called through the crack in the door. I can see the flash and fluff of feathers as she’s shouldering her gear.


September 8, 2009 - 3:52pm -- swingbug

Luke walks up to me wearing a pirate hat and singing a pirate song. In one hand, he is brandishing a pirate sword. In the other hand, he has... a hippopotamus.

“What are you doing with the hippopotamus?”

He looks at the hippo. He looks at me. He puts on an exasperated expression that I should go ahead and get cozy with. I think I’m going to be seeing it a lot over the next twenty-some-odd years.

“Holding on to it.”

Duh, Mom.

I Blame the Fish People

June 18, 2007 - 8:12am -- swingbug

Shawn and I went out on a date yesterday to see Pirates III. I had resolved not to see this one until I had gotten some positive feedback, as I was utterly disappointed in the second. Many people have tried to tell me that one cannot judge the quality of a sequel based on the first movie in a series. Bullocks. A sequel, by definition, is a continuation of a story.

An Important Holiday

September 19, 2006 - 12:00am -- swingbug

I've been so busy lately, there has been little time for blogging. In fact, I have three unfinished blogs sitting here on my desktop that I never got around to completing and posting. However, I don't believe in back-blogging so that was then and this is now. The world has moved on.

The Halloween Report

November 4, 2005 - 12:00am -- swingbug

I had a 4 day celebration for Halloween this year. Here's the recap.

Jenny's Pumpkin Carving Party
Every year my friend and neighbor Jenny throws a pumpkin carving party. Not only does she throw a good party but it's a great opportunity to do the pumpkin mess in someone else's house. And Cheryl came up for the party which was awesome. Being the studious grad student that she is, I don't get to see enough of her. A wonderful kick-off to the weekend. And may I just say that Jenny makes the best clam dip ever?

A Pirate's Life for Me

June 27, 2005 - 12:00am -- swingbug

It's June in Sacramento Valley. Nearly July, in fact.

It's nearly July in the Sacramento Valley and I'm wearing long pants and a flannel shirt. And I'm still cold and considering another layer. What's wrong with this picture?

Well, I'm at work of course. The AC vent over my desk is whistling along merrily and the overhead fluorescent lights are twitching along in time with the song and I'm at my desk slowing shriveling up and bleaching in cumulative response.

Heaven forbid we open a window.

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