I watched the next to last episode of Voyager last night. Shawn and I have been Netflixing StarTrek. We started with The Next Generation, moving through chronologically. We picked up Deep Space Nine along the timeline and bid farewell to Captain Picard after seven good seasons. And a few years into Deep Space Nine, as the war with the Dominion swelled, we met a little lost ship named Voyager, deep in the Delta Quadrant. Now the U.S.S. Enterprise has departed and we left Deep Space Nine with its prophets and changelings and self-sealing stem bolts. For quite some time we've been alone in the Delta quadrant with Captain Janeway and her crew, piloting through the unknown.
In some respects, StarTrek now fills the role in my life that my little yellow blankey filled when I was a child. It's my comfort zone. If our world of wars and chaos gets to be too much for us, we watch Star Trek where life is a little cleaner and kinder. If Shawn's out of town and I'm depressed, I watch Star Trek. If I've had a bad day at work, we watch StarTrek. Just last night Shawn heard me exclaim, "See, why can't I work for Captain Janeway? She understands her crewmen!"
It's been a week of goodbyes. I've lost two good co-workers this week and while I'm trying to be happy for them, going on to better things, I can't imagine how this ship is going keep running without them. Today is Maggie's last day and the cross-fire of strange vibes firing around the office is overwhelming. No one is sure that we can make it without her. We've got new people wandering around, not knowing what to make of the murk of emotions lying over the building, and old hands that are walking around vainly looking for something specific to concentrate on. Offices being moved, computer cords dangling from walls. Dust of a hundred artifact boxes that haven't been touched for months in the lab being stirred up and sifting through the ventilation system. Old dust unsettled.
A weird day.
I was talking to my dad the other day about office change. He was remarking about how people always talk about how routine and stability are so important for kids. Don't change the schedule on them. He said that the thing is that it's like that for adults too, we just don't want to admit it. We like our routines and structures. We don't like change. I've certainly never been fond of it. Especially endings. I don't care for those at all.
I think I'm going to sit on that last episode of Voyager for awhile. Take advantage of the wonderful no-late-charges policy of Netflix and just let that disc sit there next to the T.V. Eventually, I'm going to have to allow that little lost ship in the Delta Quadrant find its way home.
But maybe not just yet.